Katherine Heigl opened up about her departure from Grey’s Anatomy in a candid interview with Ellen Pompeo, admitting that there were times when she was “really mouthy” because her boundaries were “crossed.”
The 44-year-old portrayed Dr Izzie Stephens in the blockbuster medical drama for five years before leaving in 2010 after rumours of a squabble on set, with reports that she was ‘difficult’ behind the scenes.
Years later, the Knocked Up actor said that her family was instrumental in her choice to leave the spotlight.
In a conversation for Variety’s Actors on Actors series, Katherine unpacked the speculation over her exit and feeling ‘shame’ after being labeled ‘difficult’.
‘I was so naive. I got on my soapbox and I had some things to say, and I felt really passionate about this stuff. I felt really strongly. I felt so strongly that I also got a megaphone out on my soapbox,’ she told her former co-star. ‘There was no part of me that imagined a bad reaction.
‘I felt really justified in how I felt about it and where I was coming from. I’ve spent most of my life – I think most women do – being in that people-pleasing mode.
‘It’s really disconcerting when you feel like you have really displeased everybody. It was not my intention to do so, but I had some things to say, and I didn’t think I was going to get such a strong reaction.
‘I was in my late 20s. It took me until probably my mid- to late-30s to really get back to tuning out all of the noise and going, “But who are you? Are you this bad person? Are you ungrateful? Are you unprofessional? Are you difficult?” Because I was confused!
‘I thought maybe I was. I literally believed that version, and felt such shame for such a long time, and then had to go, “Wait. Who am I listening to? I’m not even listening to myself. I know who I am.”’
Katherine’s tenure on Grey’s Anatomy sparked rumours in 2008, when she opted not to pursue Emmy nominations, claiming that she ‘hadn’t been given the material to deserve the candidature’.
After Dr Izzie departed the show midway through season six, she took a break from the business amid rumours of conflicts about her character’s development.
When Ellen suggested that ‘nobody likes a super confident woman’, Katherine explained that she found a freedom in her 40s, as she was able to step away from the role of being a ‘young, sweet, naïve, people-pleaser’.
‘I absolutely had no idea who I was and what I wanted and who I was supposed to be and who to make happy,’ she continued. ‘Then Grey’s hit, and the success happened. I think that gave me this confidence that was a false sense of confidence. It was rooted in something that couldn’t and maybe wouldn’t always last for me.
‘So, then I started getting real mouthy, because I did have a lot to say, and there were certain boundaries and things that I was not okay with being crossed. I didn’t know how to fight that.
‘If you cannot stand up for yourself in this industry, very few people will stand up for you, so you better learn how to, and you better be okay with them not liking you for it.
‘You have to fight and you have to be brave, and if it all goes away because you fought and you were brave, then it all goes away because it will not be worth it otherwise. It just won’t.’
Ellen praised the way that Katherine navigated the fame, adding: ‘As an outsider looking in, I saw a lot around you that wasn’t anything to do with you, or your fault. Not many people would know how to react to that much attention, that much focus, that much pressure.
‘There has to be some forgiveness, or some grace, for not everybody being able to handle every situation perfectly. I’ve certainly never handled every situation perfectly. I’d like to see other people try to walk a mile in your shoes during that time, and let’s see how they would’ve handled it.’
Source My Celebrity Life.